User blog:McLarenP1 Boy/Asphalt Stories: Hoonigan Troubles

This episode depicts the following:
 * 1) The UNSC Infinity making an emergency slipspace jump over fears of K.A.R.R. discovering the supercarrier and destroying her.
 * 2) Me and Blue Team landing at Sanghelios for a celebratory dinner, with Arbiter Thel 'Vadam soon discovering the truth about the VVS.
 * 3) Master Chief, Linda, and Kelly revealing that Horizon Britain's racers have been angry about the excessive numbers of Hoonigans.
 * 4) Spartan-II Red Team arriving and meeting me and Blue Team.
 * 5) K.A.R.R. summoning a horde of Hoonigans to further terrorize AsphaltLand.
 * 6) Me sending desperate distress messages to Audi R8 tyke, TF2014, and Azelfland about K.A.R.R.'s Hoonigan horde.
 * 7) Chief briefly telling Red Team about what has happened leading from the Spartan-II training to the current events in AsphaltLand.

{at UNSC Infinity}

(the alarms are blaring loudly. A yellow AI appears, with his avatar based on WWII pilot Roland Beamont)

Roland: “Captain Lasky, Sarah Palmer, distress calls, all channels.”

Sarah Palmer: “Alert! Everyone! We got a new potential major threat!”

Kelly-087: “What is it?!”

Thomas Lasky: “Vincent is now trying to target us with K.A.R.R.!”

(I come up behind Kelly, armed with a heavily upgraded Spartan Laser with green and red stripes on it)

Me: “K.A.R.R.?”

Palmer: “The main antagonist of Knight Rider, except he's now even more of a threat than ever. He's now taking the form of a Lamborghini Centenario that can transform into anything. Get ready, everyone! If the VVS wants to come here and kill us all, we'll destroy them first!”

Me: “Selene's Lance, don't do me wrong.”

Lasky: “Do make escape! Liutenant Jet! Emergency slipspace! Now!”

Liutenant: “Aye aye, captain!”

(the Infinity performs an emergency slipspace jump and escapes through a slipspace portal that sends the supercarrier further away from the VVS's reach)

{Sanghelios, the homeworld of the Elites}

(Arbiter Thel 'Vadam observes a D81-LRT Condor arriving by his tent camp)

Thel 'Vadam: “It must be the Chief and his friends.”

(Two Swords of Sanghelios Elite Storms accompany the Arbiter out of the tent, all armed with unsheathed Energy Swords, with the Arbiter having his own Prophets' Bane Energy Sword)

(The Condor then safely lands. Coming out of it are four Spartan-IIs and then me)

Me: “Sanghelios?”

Fred-104: “Yes. This is the Elite homeworld, and currently one of the places where we can safely hide from the VVS, who I heard is now trying to reopen the portal to this dimension from AsphaltLand.”

Kelly-087: “That portal is only going to take forever to open.”

Linda-058: “I'm thinking the same thing.”

John-117: “Arbiter?”

('Vadam then approaches the Chief, ready to shake his hand)

Thel 'Vadam: “It's you, the Chief. Greetings. And now you have a young friend here with you and your Spartans.”

(both shake their hands)

John-117: “There are matters we have to talk about. Especially concerning our young friend McLaren here.”

Fred-104: “We're currently on the run from the VVS, an evil organization hellbent on enslaving and destroying the entire world. The VVS destroyed two garages, one of them being McLaren's. Then, the VVS managed to knock TransportFan2014 unconscious through a rogue Lamborghini named K.A.R.R. Now, they're attempting to get to us so they can kill us all.”

Thel 'Vadam: “I never thought I would have to fight humans again, but boy, the VVS are really evil humans! I shall spill their blood and make them never see the light of day again!”

Elite Storm 1: “We have received intel from the Infinity regarding that portal from AsphaltLand to this dimension, and so far, no successful attempt has been made to reopen it.”

(Fred holds my Selene's Lance Spartan Laser in his hands)

Fred-104: “You mind if I carry this with me for now?”

Me: “It's really heavy, so go ahead and carry it. My back's almost about to break.”

Thel 'Vadam: “Come. We'll have a dinner here and then we'll allow you to return to the Infinity.”

(all of us go into the tent for a tasty dinner celebrating the fall of Jul 'Mdama's Covenant faction. The dinner consists of food from Sanghelios)

(after an hour, Linda eats the last meal)

Me: “That was so delicious!”

Fred-104: “I'm really stuffed!”

John-117: “Thanks for the dinner.”

Elite Storm 2: “I am glad all of you appreciated this dinner. Come back, if you want, for more delicious delicacies.”

(the four Spartan-IIs get ready to depart for the Infinity along with me)

Thel 'Vadam: “Farewell. May luck be on your side.”

('Vadam then goes out of his tent as the Spartans depart in the Condor with me, and the two Elite Storms accompany him to view the moon)

Thel 'Vadam (raising his Prophets' Bane): “The Covenant has fallen, and soon, the VVS will fall too!”

(the two Elites and the Arbiter roar victoriously)

{aboard the Condor, which is heading back to the Infinity}

Me: “You know how Selene's Lance operates, right?”

Fred-104: “This is an advanced model of the Spartan Laser, internally known as the Weapon/Anti-Vehicle Model 6/Enhanced Grindell/Galilean Nonlinear Rifle, or W/AV M6/E G/GNR for short. As an advanced model, Selene's Lance is built with new components from the labs in Seongnam back on Earth, giving it a faster charge time and a longer beam duration, as well as a 50% larger battery capacity compared to the standard model. Its targeting laser also damages targets, and the actual laser itself is capable of disintegrating targets in the same manner as the Incineration Cannon. However, to offset its extreme damage capabilities, it has more recoil than normal and cannot pierce through multiple targets at once.”

Me: “This might come in handy against K.A.R.R. In case he comes for us.”

Fred-104: “You'll never know when he comes. All that matters is that we are ready.”

Me: “I'd rather die to Balaho's Grunts than have to work for the VVS again!”

Kelly-087: “Not to worry, we'll protect you every step of the way.”

{3 hours later, the Condor returns to the Infinity, landing at Docking Bay 11}

UNSC Marine 1: “Good to see you, Spartans.”

(the five of us, me and Blue Team, head back to the Infinity s bridge)

Me: “Roland. Status?”

Roland: “The VVS has kidnapped TransportFan2014 and his girls, and they kidnapped Azelfland's girlfriend too. The VVS now wants Azelfland's garage gone. For good.”

Me (becoming more and more furious and frustrated): “About that K.A.R.R. thing, what does he want with us?!” (grabs an ARC-920 and loads it up)

Roland: “K.A.R.R. wants to get in our dimension and destroy the Infinity, thus killing us all. The portal to here from AsphaltLand is permanently closed, though, but we'll never know if we really are in the clear.”

Me: “This is too much! I can't handle this anymore!!” (furiously drops the ARC-920 onto the ground)

(Roland stares at me, shocked)

Roland: “Are you alright?”

Me: “I just can't... please, this is too much! I have seen my friends suffer, that wretch Vincent actually brainwashed me to work for the VVS, this is just too much!!”

(Fred comes in)

Fred-104: “McLaren! You alright? I have never seen you this furious before. I know what happened to you.” (safely escorts me to a separate room where the rest of Blue Team is)

(we eventually come to a quiet room)

Me: “Some peace and quiet? Just what I wanted. Thanks, Fred. I was almost ready to die from my own anger outbursts.”

John-117: “Our intel shows us that K.A.R.R. is not capable of teleportation to Infinity.”

(I breathe a small sight of relief)

John-117: “And you hate Hoonigans too, right?”

Me (weakly): “Yeah.”

Linda-058: “I have a feeling someone must be forcing Horizon Britain to accept new deliveries of these Hoonigan cars.”

Kelly-087: “This might explain why Horizon Britain has also been up in arms about not getting what they want.”

Me: “Well, time to destroy every Hoonigan car on sight then. The VVS could be behind this, or it could be someone new.”

Fred-104: “First, we need to find out who keeps sending Horizon Britain those vile wheels.”

(1 day later)

Fred-104: “The Spartan-II Red Team of the UNSC Spirit of Fire is coming to visit us. They might just have some new help for your friends back at AsphaltLand.”

(eventually, the Spartan-IIs of Red Team come in)

Jerome-092: “Jerome-092 of UNSC Spirit of Fire. Never thought I'd see you again, Chief.” (shakes Chief's hand)

Alice-130: “Alice-130.” (shakes Kelly's hand)

Douglas-042: “Douglas-042 here.” (shakes Fred's hand) ”Good to see the Centurion back with us, isn't it?”

Fred-104: “Yeah. I used to be part of your team, then I went on to lead Blue Team for a long time until we reunited with Chief in 2557.”

Alice-130: “Lately, I've been hearing about AsphaltLand and some evil organization that is terrorizing it.”

Me: “It's the VVS. AKA Vivendi Squadron. They are beyond evil.”

Douglas-042: “Worse than the Banished?”

Linda-058: “You mean that splinter Covenant faction led by Atriox?”

Douglas-042: “Yes.”

Me: “Definitely worse than any Covenant faction in history. They just kidnapped one of my friends and now they are trying to kill another one. I was getting absolutely fed up with being in AsphaltLand, so I escaped. Fred and the rest of Blue Team helped me, but to my surprise, Spartan Buck came along to help me too.”

Jerome-092: “The VVS really wants to enslave not just all of AsphaltLand, but also destroy all of humanity. I hear they grabbed a $2.3 million hypercar and turned that into the reincarnation of K.A.R.R. You know, that villain from Knight Rider.”

Me: “K.A.R.R. is now even more dangerous than we thought. TF2014's hybrid and electric cars are a select few beings who know K.A.R.R.'s weaknesses.”

Linda-058: “Alice, Douglas, the VVS is led by a known criminal named Vincent Bollore. His time isn't gonna last long now, though.”

Me (pulling out my phone): “Look at this! Just what is K.A.R.R. doing?!”

{back at AsphaltLand, at an abandoned garage}

K.A.R.R.: “I am invincible. Virtually nobody knows my weaknesses.” (creates and commands a horde of 14 Hoonigan cars)

(the following cars appear):
 * 1) Chevrolet Bel Air
 * 2) Chevrolet Napalm Nova
 * 3) Ford Escort RS1800
 * 4) Ford “Hoonicorn” Mustang
 * 5) Ford RS200 Evolution
 * 6) GYMKHANA 8 Ford Fiesta ST RX43
 * 7) GYMKHANA 9 Ford Focus RS RX
 * 8) GYMKHANA 10 Ford Escort Cosworth Group A
 * 9) GYMKHANA 10 Ford F-150 “Hoonitruck”
 * 10) GYMKHANA 10 Ford Fiesta
 * 11) GYMKHANA 10 Ford Focus RS RX
 * 12) GYMKHANA 10 Ford Hoonicorn Mustang V2
 * 13) Mazda RX-7 Twerkstallion
 * 14) Rauh-Welt Begriff Porsche 911 Turbo (964)

K.A.R.R.: “Come, my children! Serve and capture AsphaltLand!” (the 14 Hoonigans bow and follow K.A.R.R., who is in Centenario form)

(3 hours later, an AsphaltLand refugee in a Savage Rivale GTR speeds past them)

Hoonicorn V2: “Stop him!” (catches up to the Savage Rivale GTR and destroys it, along with the driver)

Twerkstallion: “Another fugitive dead by our hands!” (laughs evilly)

(54 minutes later, a Type-54 Banshee with Ultra painting appears out of nowhere and destroys the Hoonigan Focuses with its triple-explosion fuel rod cannon, thus leaving 12 Hoonigans alive)

K.A.R.R.: “This loss is unaccept-” (is soon EMP'd for 2 minutes by a gravity bomb from out of nowhere, which simultaneously EMPs all the surrounding Hoonigans for 2.5x the same duration as well)

K.A.R.R.'s internal computers: “ERROR. VEHICLE DISABLED. VEHICLE DISABLED. ELECTROMAGNETIC PULSE DETECTED.”

Vincent: “Not cool, stupid Warden. I just created these Hoonigans to serve as my new enforcers, and you came here to destroy them?!”

Warden Eternal (in the distance): “You VVS human pests just do not know when to give up. Either relent, or die by my hand!”

Fiesta RX43: “Nobody gives a damn about you, Warden. AsphaltLand is ours!”

Vincent: “Begone! Sc-” (is sent flying away for 235,149 miles by an angry Promethean Knight Commander with an Incineration Cannon)

(the Hoonigan RS200, Hoonicorn, and Hoonigan Porsche do tandem donuts around the Savage Rivale GTR's burning wreckage)

{back at the UNSC Infinity}

Kelly-087: “He's brought in a horde of Hoonigans!”

Me: “AsphaltLand is gonna burn to a crisp even sooner than we thought! But now, our priority here is to stay safe. Alright, just let me text some friends still stuck in AsphaltLand.”

Fred-104: “I got you.” (escorts me to a quiet room where I can broadcast distress messages to the friends efficiently)

Me (message to Azelfland): “Azelfland, bad news. K.A.R.R. isn't just heading for your garage to destroy it. He's summoned a horde of Hoonigans, and they're coming after you, TF2014, and Audi R8 tyke too! Good news is, these Hoonigans can be destroyed very easily. And as far as I know, Vincent may think he is a god, but you're not going down without a fight. And neither am I.”

Me (message to Audi R8 tyke): “You and your cars had better be more ready than ever. K.A.R.R. has summoned an army of Hoonigans, and he's sending them after you, Azelfland, and TF2014! Bad news is, they killed someone trying to escape from AsphaltLand. Good news is, these Hoonigans can be destroyed easily. Still, just destroy them on sight when you can! You will know when you see them!”

Me (message to TF2014): “TF2014! I hope you're alright! If you can see this, please respond! There is a horde of Hoonigan cars that K.A.R.R. just summoned, and he's sending them after you, Azelfland, and Audi R8 tyke! I let Audi R8 tyke know that he and his cars can and should destroy them on sight because the good news is, these Hoonigans are extremely susceptible to damage, as two of the Hoonigan Focuses died to a triple-explosion fuel rod blast from an Ultra Banshee and the rest took major damage. Either way, I just hope you can escape from AsphaltLand because Vincent and his minions, especially K.A.R.R., are now claiming that they can just get to the Halo dimension, but here's the thing: all portals to the Halo universe from AsphaltLand have been closed off for good, and they are all heavily guarded by Prometheans loyal to the Librarian and her remnant.”

Fred-104: “Done yet? Ready whenever you are.”

Me: “Yeah. My hands just got tired from the texting. I had to plug in an external keyboard for all this.”

(Fred brings me back to the room where Red Team and the rest of Blue Team are hanging out)

Audi R8 tyke (message to me): “Wow, K.A.R.R. is leading a horde of Hoonigans? Thanks, I'll let my cars know so they can prepare like it's a DEFCOM 2 situation. My AHGT should be able to deal with them, hopefully. And yes, I will get out of AsphaltLand sooner or later.”

Jerome-092: “What's been happening, Chief? So much has been happening since the training days.”

John-117: “So much has happened I can't tell it all. The Great War, the Forerunners' return, losing Cortana, reuniting with Blue Team, the rise of the Created, and now the AsphaltLand troubles, with K.A.R.R. rising to power.”

Douglas-042: “K.A.R.R. is so out of his mind. He really thinks he can destroy us. He doesn't realize how impervious Infinity really is, and he doesn't realize that we aren't gonna go down without a fight. And to think I was almost killed by Atriox, the Brute who leads the Banished.”

(7 minutes later)

Alice-130 (loading up her M45D Tactical Shotgun): “If the VVS come here looking for a fight, let's give 'em one.”

Linda-058, Kelly-087 (simultaneously): “Yes.”

Fred-104: “We'll have to find a way to fight back. And we'll have to know K.A.R.R.'s true weaknesses. But only those allied hybrid and electric cars over at AsphaltLand know the answer, and they're willing to tell the answers to us.”

Me: “And how is Heihachi still alive?! I thought Kazuya killed him already.”

Fred-104: “From the intel I gathered on him, he was cloned.”

Me: “Really. And I'd rather die to the Flood than be brainwashed to work for the VVS again!”

Fred-104: “You're still safe with us, brother.” (hugs me and pats me on the back)