User blog:Azelfland/Asphalt stories: the Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG Coupe Black Series recruitment and the Hyundai i30N R&D

don't you hate it when you have to deal with two R&D at once? i know all of us did. and i'll say it right now. i'm glad i beat the SLS AMG Coupe Black Series R&D while doing the i30N R&D at the same time. and speaking of the i30N R&D, i got a bad feeling about the final AI.

this is episode 2 of season 10 of "Asphalt stories". here goes:

inside the Trivia app

Trivia bot: helloooooooooooo, people. i'm your Rogue AI nightmare, Trivia Bot. i tell you trivia, you drive and if you somehow survive, you get a BRAND........ NEW............. CAR!!:D

Hanna: is this a trivia show?:I

Silver Azelfland: i dunno. but we need to be cautious.>:I

My Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG Coupe Black Series: we have no choice. let's do it.>:I

2 days later, at test 48

Trivia bot: to get out of the app, you'll need to race me. win and you get a BRAND.................. NEW..................... CAR!! lose, and you're stuck here. forever.>:)

Loraine: that's no bueno.O_O

R8 tyke's R8 E-Tron SE hologram: have you tried the "spotlight on the host" button?:I

Hanna: huh. haven't thought of that.:I

Trivia bot: NO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! WHATEVER YOU DO, DON'T PRESS THAT BUTTON!!O_O

Hanna: what? i'm sorry. i can't hear you over the sound of how dead you are!>:P *presses the "spotlight on the host" button*

Jiggy 2000: ah, s**t! she figured it out!>:(

Everyone: JIGGY 2000?!O_O

Me: so YOU'RE behind all this!>:(

Jiggy 2000: who's that Jiggy 2000 you're talking about?:I

Hanna: DON'T PLAY DUMB!! WE KNOW IT'S YOU!>:(

Jiggy 2000: yes, it was me all along! Azelfland, if you want to get out of here, you'll need to-

Me: yeah, yeah. i'll have to beat you. you said it before.-_-

Jiggy 2000: but you won't, because you'll lose against CLONES OF MYSELF!!>:D

after test 49

Me: you were saying?>:)

Jiggy 2000: GODDAMN IT!! fine! i'll deal with you myself!>:(

at test 50

Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG Coupe Black Series: ready for round 4?>:)

Jiggy 2000: this time, i'll beat you.>:(

Me: just try. i know your weakness anyway.>:)

Jiggy 2000: oh, really? this time, i'll beat you in your own game. now i can take corners like a champ.>:)

Me: we'll see about that!>:I

Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG Coupe Black Series: well, what do we do?:I

Me: he seems serious. luckily, i know Dubai like the palm of my hand. this will be an easy win.>:)

the race begins

Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG Coupe Black Series: WHOA! DID YOU SEE THAT?!O_O

Me: yep. but trust me on this. we'll get him.>:I

at the two-way

Me: he'll pick the right path. take the left path.>:I

Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG Coupe Black Series: you got it, buddy.:)

on the end of the right path

Jiggy 2000: I'M FINALLY GONNA WIN THIS!:D

Me (coming from the left path): TOO SOON, JUNIOR!>:)

Jiggy 2000: THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!!! HOW DID YOU...............?!O_O

Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG Coupe Black Series: eat my exhaust fumes!>:D *finishes in first and does celebratory donuts*

Me: YEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSS!!! SUCK IT!! I DON'T CARE IF I SPENT ANY TOKENS!! NOR DO I CARE IF THE SLS AMG COUPE BLACK SERIES IS USELESS!! MMMMMMMMMMM!!! SO WORTH IT! TAKE THAT, VIVENDI! YOU AIN'T GOT NOTHING ON ME!!>:D *does the Crash Bandicoot victory dance*

Jiggy 2000: ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! HOW DID YOU EVEN KNOW I TOOK THE RIGHT PATH?! I WAS BEHIND YOU AFTER THE FIRST TURN!>:(

Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG Coupe Black Series: that's because he predicted your move before you could do it.>:)

Jiggy 2000: THIS IS UNFAIR!! YOU CHEATED!>:(

Me: ever heard of something called "skill"? look it up, pal!>:P

Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG Coupe Black Series: oh, wait. you're an AI. you're supposed to know that. and yet you got beaten by a former human being, hence an Azelf, that has the power to read minds. so deal with it.>:)

The crowd (from the SIKE! that's the wrong number! video): OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!:D

Me: well, then. i guess you still can't take the turns right.>:)

Jiggy 2000: THIS ISN'T OVER!!! I'LL BEAT YOU SOMEDAY!!>:(

Me: well, looks like someone is still being a sore loser after losing 4 times in a row.:P

meanwhile, in the real world

TraceG11: i hope they're safe.:I

TheHawtDawg1: yeah. me too.:I

Me, Hanna, Loraine and Silver Azelfland: *screaming goat*

Me: oof!X_X

Hanna: ow!X_X

Loraine: ow!X_X

Silver Azelfland: DOH!X_X

Me: ow................. well, that's one way to end an R&D.:I

TraceG11: you're back!:D

Feuerrm: so, how'd it go?:)

Loraine: mission accomplished.:)

Hanna: Jiggy 2000 has been eliminated. for the fourth time.:P

R&D technician: who's Jiggy 2000?:I

My Rimac Concept One: he's the AI Azelfland beat five months back, in my brother's R&D. after Jiggy 2000 lost to Azelfland, he had a personal grudge against him. and ever since, he's been trying to beat him in the RX-8 SE and the ST1 GT R&Ds, but failed. miserably. i'm sure he'll do the same in the Hyundai i30N R&D.:I

R&D technician: oh. i see. well, rogue AIs aside, we finally eliminated it thanks to you guys.:)

Alice: don't forget who did all the driving, though.:P

R&D technician: right. well, Azelfland. a promise is a promise. the SLS AMG Coupe Black Series is all yours.:)

Me: thanks.^_^

My Mosler GT3: well, i'm glad we got this godforsaken R&D over with.:P

Me: agreed. it was frustrating.:I

Big Smoke (in the distance): ALL WE HAD TO DO WAS FOLLOW THE DAMN TRAIN, CJ!>:(

Me: and beating this R&D was just as frustrating as hearing this line over and over.:P

McLaren P1 boy: there's something that's off, though. *sees the VVS trying to sneak away* GOTCHA, BITCH!>:D

Vincent: ah, s**t! he figured it out!>:(

Diana: well, then. old habits never die, huh?:P

Shelby: yep.:P

My Mercedes-Benz Silver Lightning: in fact, you rigged the challenges. knowing Azelfland would get to the R&D, you made the Ai go rogue immidiately. at first, we didn't know what it was, but after Hanna pressed the "spotlight on the host" button, Jiggy 2000 finally revealed himself. but he was nothing more than a joke. you wanted to trap Azelfland in the trivia app, so would take over the world with ease. and failed miserably.>:)

Mike458: and we would've gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for you meddling kids!>:(

Wanda: yep. old habits like this one never die.:P

Hanna: i almost forgot. suck on this.>:) *gives the VVS the middle finger*

Vincent: WHY YOU LITTLE........................ YOUR BOYFRIEND DIDN'T EVEN DESERVE THOSE CARS IN THE FIRST PLACE!>:(

MICROAGGRESSION! HIT HIM!>:D

Vincent: NOT THIS CRAP A- ugh! you know what, just do it already.:(

Shadow Azelfland: *bumps his fists and uses the Electric Fly* GIMMEMYMONEYYYYYYYYYYYY! *uses it again* GOTTASUCKMYNUTS! *and again* BRINGALLTHESAUUUUUUUUUCE! *and again* JOHNYSTARTTHECAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR!D:<

Flora: you still haven't learnt your manners, meanie. do you even know what DK stands for?>:I

Vincent: Donkey Kong?O_O

Flora: actually, yes. but it's also A DICK KICK!>:( *kicks Vincent right in the nuts*

Vincent: AUGH! oh, my English tea bags.X_X

Shadow Azelfland: now stay down, maggot!>:( *zaps the rest of the VVS to unconsciousness*

back at Azelfland's garage

Mercedes-Benz Silver Lightning: phew. finally got back home.:)

My Mazda RX-8: well, we're not done yet. we still have the i30N R&D to deal with.:P

Mosler GT3: guess i'll come as moral support.:I

lab 3 of the Hyundai i30N

Hyundai i30N: strange. you guys told me about Sunny's gang trying to take us down.:I

Mazda RX-8: well, here's the thing. Azelfland and TweakRacer have always been enemies, after the incident with the 918 Spyder with Weissach Package. during the Kawasaki Z800 championship however, he was sent as a double spy, used Wanda to his advantage and then found the chance to betray us. which was during the time the "Rocket Bunny" me would be introduced to the public.>:I

TraceG11: i basically warned Azelfland about this.>:I

Hyundai i30N: and how did you actually meet Azelfland?:I

TraceG11: well, when i came in, my first job was to spy on Azelfland.exe before the VVS was formed. that's how i found out about the whole fiasco with the chaos emeralds.:P

Havana, Cuba, five months ago

Vivendi goon 1: man, this guard job is so boring. they want us to guard the meeting room?>:(

Vivendi goon 2: yeah, man. i want to force people into paying us, not guard some stupid meeting.>:(

TraceG11 (coming in): i'll put you out of your misery.>:) *shoots the goons with his silenced handgun*

Vivendi goon 3: hey, you! stop ri- *gets shot*

TraceG11: okay. time to hide in the vents.>:I

in the meeting room

Azelfland.exe: IMBECILES!! FOOLS!! NINCOMPOOPS!! *slams his hand to the table* CAN'T YOU IDIOTS DO ANYTHING RIGHT?! according to THIS, your track record for spreading evil IS PATHETIC!!>:( *slams his hand to the table again*

Vincent: but Azelfland.exe, it's not our fault! that wretched Azelfland is to blame!>:(

Azelfland.exe: GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!! i won't let ANYONE get in the way of evil! ESPECIALLY NOT MY ALTER EGO!! AZELFLAND MUST BE ELIMINATED!!>:(

Anais: um, Azelfland.exe, need i remind you that Azelfland always finds a way to defeat us? maybe he's just too good for us.:I

Azelfland.exe: *slams his hands to the table* ENOUGH EXCUSES!! YOU FIVE IDIOTS NEED TO COME UP WITH ONE GOOD PLAN!!! OR ELSE...................!>:(

Vincent: how do i always get into these situations? oh god.:(

Dr. Eggman: there must be something we can come up with. say, Vincent. haven't you been tinkering with some kind of new secret weapon of yours?>:I

Vincent: i don't know what you're talking about, Eggman.:I

Anais: Vincent, honey. i think he's referring to the super secret weapon you've been working on day and night since the last time Azelfland defeated you.:P

Azelfland.exe: ENOUGH FIGURING!! DO WE HAVE A PLAN?!>:(

Vincent: well, in my scientific endeavors, i've been able to create a genetically advanced super weapon of unbelievable strength. but the power source................... is the final missing crucial element to cause chaos.>:I

Azelfland.exe: hm............ chaos............................. chaos.................... YEEEEEEEESSSS!!! THE CHAOS EMERALDS!!!>:D

Vincent: right! the chaos emeralds! that's it! if we can find them and unleash their destructive energy, it will create enough power to bring my secret weapon to life. we'd have a weapon capable of crushing mountains, demolishing entire cities!:D

Azelfland.exe: and wiping Azelfland off the face of the Earth FOREVER!!>:D

Vincent: get ready to face my WRATH, Azelfland! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!>:D

back to the present

Chica: what about when you helped Azelfland escape with "the boat 2.0"?:I

TraceG11: that's when my Survolt and i took down those Vivendi goons.:P

Turkey, Instabul, five months ago

Me: your handling is so baaaaaaaaad!>_<

My Nanoflowcell QUANT FE: well, blame Vivendi for that one.-_-

a DS Survolt comes in

Trace's DS Survolt: BAM!! take that, you Vivendi goons!>:D

Nanoflowcell QUANT FE: was that your Survolt?O_O

Me: i don't think so. must be someone else's Survolt.:I

Nanoflowcell QUANT FE: in any case, he saved us.^_^

bkac to the present (again)

TraceG11: and that's why i'm loyal to Azelfland. like Thunder, Azelfland is like the twin brother i've never had.:)

Hyundai i30N: cool. but getting to the point, what happened to TweakRacer afterwards?:I

Mosler GT3: we're not sure. what I AM sure of is that this whole turn of events will be like SMG4's Waluigi arc.:I

Me: what do you mean?:I

Mosler GT3: you know how TweakRacer was blamed because your edgy self -his creation- and his girl took him down? well, he's going to develop the power of rejection. TweakRacer here and SMG4's Waluigi in the Waluigi arc have something in common. the power of rejection. when they get rejected, their power is greatly affected. it means this. once TweakRacer gets rejected even by Nuke, he'll get so powerful that he won't need anyone else and he'll be able to create his own zombie army. at some point, he'll be as overpowered as Thanos from Avengers: Infinity War.>:I

Feuerrm: wait, what does Thanos from Avengers: Infinity War have to do with this?:I

Mosler GT3: well, it's because, in the movie, Thanos is just THAT powerful with all the infinity stones. and what we're experiencing is kind of like Avengers: Infinity War, except...................... well, it's TweakRacer and the power of rejection inside him. he's like Thanos and we're like the Avengers. that's what it looks like.>:I

TheHawtDawg1: so, let me get this straight. because we all rejected him, he's gonna get powerful. Tweak is like Thanos. The Super Mario Bros., Sonic and his friends, Kazuya, our cars and bikes, Feuerrm, R8 tyke, TF2014, EliteHectorX, Anthony Jose, NEKON, Azelfland, all of us here, are like The Avengers. did i get that right?O_O

Mazda RX-8: are you a psychic or something?O_O

Mosler GT3: one, you got that right, Lucas. and two, no, i'm not a psychic. i just took a wild guess.:P

Hyundai i30N: you never know, right? well, anyway, we got more tests to do.:P

meanwhile, on the unknown location, 500 meters underground

TweakRacer: i don't need them. i don't need ANYONE. someday, they'll all pay for making a fool of me. Azelfland, Gameloft, all of you. you will all bow down to me once i'm done with you.........>:( *more of the aura of rejection surrounds TweakRacer*

and that ends episode 2 of season 10 of "Asphalt stories". this going to be like Avengers: Infinity War all over again.

until next time.

-Azelfland.