User blog:Azelfland/Car dialogues: one man's Arash, that's another man's Trezor

the title is mostly a pun of "one man's trash, that's another man's treasure". clever, right?

puns aside, the Renault Trezor championship has begun and it's right before the Lunar year 2018 update rolls on iOS, Android and Windows. of course, Windows players like me will get it last, as usual. but anyway. getting through the first tour was easy, and i'm pretty sure French Guiana will be easy, considering i nearly PROed the Trezor. also, i was legitimately dumb, TF2014. i meant to say GTA IV, not V.

this is episode 10 of season 5 of "car dialogues". this continues from where we left off last time. so, here goes:

Chica: hey, sis. what'd you find?:I

Flora: after taking a small blood sample from Azelfland, i found this.>:I *shows the Devil Gene on her computer*

Chica: what is that purple thing on his DNA?:I

Flora: that's the Devil Gene. you see, when Azelfland got shot and couldn't get up, the Devil Gene activated inside him and that made him transform into his devil form. however, unlike the Devil Gene that leaves only your destructive instincts functional, this Devil Gene makes Azelfland stronger than usual and its effect is temporary. this means Azelfland was capable of controlling the Devil Gene right from the start.>:I

Chica: whoooooooooa!:O

Flora: to activate, all it takes is a near-death moment, just like when P1 boy nearly killed him. in other words, this gene allows Azelfland to cheat death, anytime he's about to die.>:I

Chica: now, that's awesome.:)

Flora: anyway, though. how was your date last night?:3

Chica: it was so romantic and edgy at the same time. i even asked Shadow to teach me his ways of being edgy.:3

Flora: aren't you normally shy, like i am?:I

Chica: hmph. i may be shy, but we know him, when i was 15.:P

Flora: well, you sure were edgy there.:)

Flora: yeah but i got a long way to go.:I

meanwhile, back at the Asphalt labs

TF2014: thanks for saving me back there, buddy. had it not been for you, i would be dead, for sure.:)

Me: anytime. that's what friends are for, right?:)

TF2014: yeah. we always got each other's backs.:)

BMW 3.0 CSL Hommage: well, speaking of which, the staff here are working on a helmet that lets you see the stats right before your eyes.:)

TheHawtDawg1: well, the ED Design Torq made it first with a windshield.:P

Hanna: let's jump right into it, shall we?:)

after test 15

Me: you know what, screw it. we'll upgrade your handling to level 4.-_-

Alice: ARE YOU NUTS?! YOU'RE GOING TO SPEND YOUR TOKENS ON ONE UPGRADE?!O_O

Me: WHAT OTHER CHOICE DO WE HAVE, ALICE?!>:(

Alice: *sighs* fine. if you insist.:I *upgrades the Hommage's handling to level 3*

BMW 3.0 CSL Hommage: it was redundant, but thanks anyway.:)

Me: listen, Alice i'm sorry for yelling at you earlier. i just want to MAX PRO the Hommage so bad.:(

Alice: it's okay. we can simply redeem those spent tokens through this R&D.:)

after completing lab 2

BMW 3.0 CSL Hommage: hey, thanks for that free upgrade on my last acceleration upgrade.:)

Alice: anytime.:)

Sonic: hey, Wendy. i was wondering. do you want to hang out with me?:3

Wendy: really? awwwwwww, that would be great.:3

a few seconds later

Sonic: Azelfland, i need your help.:I

Me: what is it?:I

Sonic: this is my first time dating with Wendy. do you have any tips?:I

Me: you've come to the right guy. now, Hanna, Diana, TweakRacer, Wanda and i will help you to prepare yourself to impress Wendy.:)

TweakRacer: you see, asking Wendy out was the first step. and that shows how much you want to be with her................ partly.:)

Wanda: take it from someone who dates her former enemy.:)

Sonic: wait, you two were enemies?:I

Me: yep. after quitting Vivendi, however, we became friends and allies.:)

Diana: of course, TweakRacer and Wanda had to do some counseling with Hanna's dad, but only if Azelfland was present. turns out everything worked out.:)

TweakRacer: and now we're a happy couple, thanks to him.:3

Me: anyway. the next step is to make you look good.:)

Diana: here's a tuxedo. you'll need it.:) *gives Sonic a white tuxedo*

Sonic: huh. looks good on me.:)

Hanna: next step. now, girls like it when boys complement them on their looks. a simple "you're very beautiful" or "you're really cute" will do. just make sure you don't get an anime nosebleed.:)

Me: i always complement Hanna and she happens to like it when i'm kind to her.:)

TweakRacer: next is the "ladies first" rule.:)

Wanda: you see, girls also have priorities. and stepping in or out of the building first is one of them.:)

Diana: it's simple. you let Wendy step out of the building and then you follow. simple as that.:)

Wanda: also, you'll have to let her sit first when you find a table in a restaurant, or on a bench when you go for a walk.:)

Me: and while you're walking together, just hold hands. this shows your affection towards her.:)

TweakRacer: and while you're at it, girls like it when boys treat them nice.:)

Hanna: on to the next step. getting to know each other better.:)

Sonic: does that mean i get to ask her what she likes, what she dislikes, her favorite color,her interests and her personality?:I

TweakRacer: indeed. you're sharp.:)

Hanna: basically, we got an ice skating rink on the second floor of Azelfland's garage. and we actually like it.:)

Me: well, once all is said and done, confess your feelings to her. if you do, she'll confess her feelings to you. that's how Hanna and i started dating, when we first met.:)

TweakRacer: getting a first-date gift is also important. because Wendy wears Blue balerinas -the normal kind, not the ballet kind-, i suggest you get her a Green scarf, a pair of Blue high heels and a pair of Blue high-heeled mini boots, which is what i got for Wanda on our first date, but with a different color.:)

Wanda: last but not least, get down on your one knee and ask her to be your girlfriend, while holding her hands.:)

Hanna: once she says "yes", gaze into her eyes. and then that's where you make out.:)

Me: funny thing is, i gave Hanna a surprise kiss after she accepted my feelings and we were making out for like, 10 minutes straight.:)

Hanna: *giggles* he really did. and it was back when i was a human girl. it was so romantic.:3

Sonic: well, guys. i don't know what to say. you're great friends.:)

Me: anytime, buddy.:)

later that night (7:00 PM)

Sonic: *sees Wendy in her Red dress and Blue balerinas* wow. you're really cute.:3

Wendy: *giggles* why, thank you.:3

Sonic: what do you say we get something to eat?:3

Wendy: nah, i'm not that hungry. how about we go for a walk?:3

Sonic: sounds good to me. after you..:3

Wendy: *giggles* you're so gentle.:3

a few minutes later

Sonic: so, tell me about yourself.:3

Wendy: well, i'm hard-working, strong, determined and caring. i know a lot about you.:3

Sonic: you do?:I

Wendy: yeah. you're cool, you like chili dogs and fighting for freedom, you dislike injustice and you have many interests. that's all i know.:3

Sonic: i'm actually impressed.:)

Wendy: anyway. i like dancing and listening to music and i'm into ice skating and boxing. i have no dislikes and my favorite color is Red.:3

Sonic: wow. guess i didn't need to ask.:3

Wendy: everyone knows a lot about you.:3

back at the Asphalt labs (again)

NEKON: hey, Azelfland. there's a flyer for you.:I

Me: let me read it. *reads the paper* "the first ever electric car championship is here! take part to get a chance to win a Renault Trezor of yours!" huh. neat.:)

BMW 3.0 CSL Hommage: wait, what about me?:I

Me: here's how it will go. Shadow Azelfland, you'll take on the classic, unplugged and flawless races. Silver Azelfland, you'll be the drift racer. Loraine, you'll handle the infected races, since you and Hanna are immune to toxic wastes and Uranium itself. and that leaves Feuerrm with the knockdown races. Alice will stick with the upgrading, as usual. and that's that.>:I

Feuerrm: we'll handle it just fine. no worries.:)

Hanna: sounds good to me.:)

at Azelfland's garage

Renault Trezor: so, you're Azelfland, huh?:)

Me: the one and only.:)

Renault Trezor: i heard a lot of things from the Hot Wheels cars and their creators. and i see that you're the real deal.:)

My Lamborghini Sesto Elemento: and my guess is that because you're an electric car, your IQ will be as high as the IQ of the Silver Lightning and the Biome, right?:I

Renault Trezor: indeed.:)

My Mercedes-Benz Silver Lightning: it's good to see that we got another brain on the team. now, chances of winning at stock are at 50/50. if you guys upgrade and pro tune the Trezor, you'll get a guaranteed victory for sure.:)

at the Grand Finale

the announcer: ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the 17th annual Asphalt championship! the second championship of 2018 and the first ever championship that has an electric car as the reward! which is none other than the Renault Trezor!:D

Me: so, ready to win?>:)

Renault Trezor: chances of winning are at 100%. let's do this! with my brains and your brawn, we're an unstoppable combination.>:)

after the Grand Finale

Me: okay, Huayra BC. time to get to farming. we need to MAX PRO the Trezor ASAP.>:I

My Pagani Huayra BC: on it!>:I

TheHawtDawg1: are you sure about this?:I

Hanna: yes, i'm sure. besides. i need those mastery rewards anyway.:I

on the second floor of Azelfland's garage

Sonic: whoa. now, that's cool.:O

Wendy: wait till you see me ice skating. all the practice i've done in figure skating is definitely gonna pay off.:3

after an hour of ice skating

Sonic: you were truly great out there.:3

Wendy: *giggles* thanks. you too.:3

Sonic: Wendy, i have something to tell you.:I

Wendy: what is it?:3

Sonic: listen. the reason i'm like this is because.................. i got dating tips from Azelfland and your friends.:I

Wendy: it's okay. everyone is nervous the first time.:3

Sonic: i don't know how you'll take it, but................... Wendy, i....................... i'm in love with you.:3

Wendy: really? awwwwwwwwww, that's so sweet. i'm in love with you too.:3

Sonic: really?:3

Wendy: yeah. it doesn't matter if you impress me or not. i'll be with you no matter what.:3

Sonic: well, i hope you like these.:3 *gives Wendy a Green scarf, a pair of Blue high heels and a pair of Blue high-heeled mini boots*

Wendy: *gasps* for me? awwwwww, that's so sweet of you. thank you.:3

Sonic: it's the least i could do. oh, and i want to ask you this and i hope the answer is yes. Wendy...................... *gets down on his one knee* will you be my girlfriend?:3

Wendy: *bursts into tears of joy* awwwwwww, that's the sweetest thing you've ever said! this is the happiest day of my life! yes, i'll be your girlfriend! *sighs lovingly* i love you.:'3

Sonic: i love you too.:3 *they both make out*

Wendy: *as they both stop making out* you're really good at kissing, my sweetheart.:3

Sonic: thanks. you too.:3

Wendy: *giggles*

Me: *pauses the action and breaks the fourth wall* i guess having a couple of Hedgehogs making out would make a lot more sense, you might say. oh, if only getting a boyfriend or a girlfriend was this easy in real life.-_- *unpauses the action*

Sonic: we should hang out again sometime.:3

Wendy: *giggles* sure.:3

and that's the end of episode 10 of season 5 of "car dialogues". more ideas about the Trezor championship and the Hommage R&D are coming much later.

until next time.

-Azelfland.