User blog:Azelfland/Asphalt stories: the Sbarro GT1 recruitment and the BXR Bailey Blade GT1 EDD shenanigans

i'm saying this right now. i got the Sbarro GT1 at MAX only. and quite honestly, this is the first and only time i'll ever get a car at MAX only. while the third quailifer gave me a bit of trouble, i managed to do it, even without the low flat spin. the rest of it was easy. also, i started the Bailey EDD. and i was smart enough to farm to MAX it out AND give it a tuning of 3333, and of course, the 0808 Elite tuning. as for the RX-8 SE R&D, i'll have to participate 2 hours earlier than usual.

this is episode 11 of season 8 of "Asphalt stories". here goes:

the Swiss Alps

Zoe: hey, guys.^_^

Me: hey, Zoe. how's it going?:)

Zoe: good. so you're here for the Swiss Alps tour, right?:)

Hanna: yep.:)

Feuerrm: by the way, where's R8 tyke?:I

Zoe: oh, he went for the RX-8 Special Edition R&D.:P

Feuerrm: oh.:I

My Sbarro GT1: i............... think i might need a bit of PRO tuning.:I

My Porsche 718 Boxster S: it's possible, even at MAX only. you got this.>:I

Dr. Healusion: well, you never know until you try, right?:P

after the third qualifier (close call on attempt 2)

Me: *finishes with .047 seconds left* oh my gosh, OH MY GOSH! OHMYGOSH, OHMYGOSH, OHMYGOSH, OHMYGOSH, OHMYGOSH!!!!!......................... that............................. was a really close one............O_O

8 hours later, after the sixth qualifier

My Sbarro Sparta: okay, sis. this is it. the final Grand Finale. you got this.:)

Sbarro GT1: shouldn't we use an extra tank? i mean, we got 69 of them left.:I

Me: no need for it. let's go.>:I

at the Grand Finale

the announcer: this is it, folks! the final Grand Finale of the Sbarro GT1 championship! who's gonna win? who's gonna go home? let's find out!:D

Me: here we go. all that hard will be for nothing if we lose here.>:I

at the final straight of lap 2

the announcer: and it looks like they couldn't catch up. AND LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE CHAMPIONSHIP IS OVER!! WHAT A RACE!! EVERYTHING WAS LOST FOR TEAM AZELFLAND, BUT THEY MANAGED TO PULL THIS THROUGH WITHOUT HAVING TO PRO TUNE THEIR SBARRO GT1!! THEY WIN THE CAR AND A LIFETIME SUPPLY OF SBARRO'S PIZZA AS WELL!! that is it for this championship! looking forward to the Rezvani Beast Alpha championship! see you in the next championship, folks!:D

Hanna: that was awesome!:D

My Toyota Supra: we knew you could do it!^_^

My Aston Martin One-77: no tokens spent, no V8s spent! you truly killed it out there, Azelfland!^_^

Sbarro GT1: and as promised, i'll join you on your quest to take down Vivendi.:)

Sbarro Sparta: welcome to the team, sis.^_^

McLaren P1 boy: there's still something that's off, though. *sees TweakRacer trying to sneak out* GOTCHA, BITCH!>:D

TweakRacer: ah, s@#t! he figured it out!>:(

Sbarro GT1: so YOU'RE one of the guys who rigged my handling, huh?!>:(

Sbarro Sparta: he was trying to make you handle worse, sis. however, that wasn't enough to stop us from taking down the tours.>:I

Diana: and so, that loser, Heihachi Mishima and you, tried rigging the third qualifier right here, but Azelfland barely made it.>:I

Wanda: and don't think your racers could beat us. 'cause we smoked them.>:)

TweakRacer: and i wouldn've gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for you meddling kids and your annoying mentally challenged kid!>:(

Me: says the guys who gets beaten by this "mentally challenged kid".:P

Hanna: also, Azelfland is a young adult now. deal with it.>:)

the crowd (from the SIKE! that's the wrong number! video): OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!:D

Wanda: also, suck on this.>:) *gives TweakRacer the middle finger*

TweakRacer: WHY YOU LITTLE........................... I DIDN'T EVEN LOVE YOU ANYWAY AND YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A WHORE I CAN S@#T ON!>:(

Wanda: *gasps and starts crying*

Cyril: what happened, Wanda?:I

Wanda (crying): TweakRacer broke my heart.;_;

Cyril: *gets steaming mad* NO ONE BREAKS MY GIRL'S HEART AND GETS AWAY WITH IT!!>:(

TweakRacer: oh, i already have.>:)

MICROAGGRESSION! HIT HIM!>:D

TweakRacer: DON'T DO THIS!! I DIDN'T MEAN IT! I SWEAR!O_O

Me: *bumps his fists and uses the Electric Fly* GIMMEMYMONEYYYYYYYYYYYY!! *uses it again* BRINGALLTHESAUUUUUUUCE!! *and again* GOTTASUCKMYNUTS!! *and again* JOHNYSTARTTHECAAAAAAAAAAAAR!!!D:<

Cyril: not even your puny Panda bots will beat us. *talks to Wanda and pets her hair* shhhhhhhhhh. everything's gonna be okay. i'll never leave you.:3

Wanda: *stops crying* thanks, Cyril. you're such a gentleman.:3

TweakRacer: THIS IS BLASPHEMY! THIS IS MADNESS!>:(

Sbarro Sparta: MADNESS?! *Sbarro Sparta processing mode for 5 seconds* THIS! IS! SBARRO SPARTA!>:( *rams the Panda bots*

TweakRacer: uh-oh. ._.'

Wanda: YOU SON OF A BITCH!! I'LL NEVER FORGIVE YOU!!>:(

TweakRacer: we could talk this out. ._.'

Wanda: THERE'S NO TALKING OUT OF THIS ONE!!>:(

TweakRacer: look, Wanda, i'm sorry! i didn't mean it! i didn't want to break your heart!O_O

Wanda: YOU MEANT IT!!>:(

TweakRacer: I'M SORRY! WE COULD GET BACK TOGETHER!!O_O

Wanda: THERE'S NO WAY I'LL GET BACK TOGETHER WITH A TRAITOR LIKE YOU!! DO YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS TO PEOPLE WHO DARE BREAK MY HEART?!>:(

TweakRacer: they get kicked in the nuts? ._.'

Wanda: WORSE! THEY GET AN UPPERCUT TO THEIR JAW AND YOUR JAW WILL BE BROKEN AFTER THIS UPEERCUT!>:( *sends TweakRacer flying with a right uppercut*

TweakRacer: TEAM VIVENDI IS BLASTING OFF AGAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN!!!X_X *ting*

Wanda: JERK!>:(

back at Azelfland's garage

Hanna: we're back,everyone.^_^

My Mercedes-Benz SLK 55 AMG: who ARE you?!O_O

My Mercedes-Benz SLK 55 AMG Special Edition: i'm you, but stronger.:P

My Rimac Concept One: hey. i hear the RX-8 Special Edition R&D is here.>:I

Shadow Azelfland: i'll take it on tommorow night. for now, you guys focus on the Bailey.>:I

My Pagani Huayra BC: right. Biome, Concept One, you'll come with us in the Bailey's EDD.>:I

My DS Survolt: what about me?:I

My McLaren 675LT: you go for the RX-8 Special Edition tommorow night.>:I

DS Survolt: understood.>:I

My Rimac Concept S: problem is, they set four roadblocks that require a car's mastery each.>:I

Sonic: where exactly?>:I

Rimac Concept S: on the highway to hell.:P

Sonic: WHAT?!O_O

Rimac Concept S: relax. i was joking. anyway, the cars needed are our newest member, the Sbarro GT1, the One-77, the X2 and of course, me.>:I

Shelby: sounds like something serious is happening.>:I

Rimac Concept S: according to my intel, the first roadblock was made by Bowser. expect a lot of Goombas, Koopa Troopas, Hammer Bros., Boos and Shy Guys.>:I

Knuckles: the second one is made by Eggman, right?>:I

Rimac Concept S: you're sharp Knux. expect the Egg pawns out there and TweakRacer's Panda bots too.>:I

Zoe: what about the next one?:I

Rimac Concept S: the third one is made by Entity303. it's swarmed with Zombies, Spiders, Skeletons, Ghasts and Creepers.>:I

Flora: and that leaves the last roadblock that was made by Heihachi, right?:I

Rimac Concept S: right. lots of the Mishima Zaibatsu will be there. every roadblock has an equal distance between each other. for the first one, the GT1 is up. i'll take care of the second one. X2, you handle the third roadblock. and One-77, you'll take down the last one. these are on the road where it leads to Paris, France.>:I

Loraine: on Paris? where?:I

Rimac Concept S: the Eiffel Tower's bottom.>:I

Me: okay, then. all cars that are on the Bailey EDD, let's go.>:I

My Alfa Romeo Mito GTA: hopefully we can make it in time.:I

Paris, France

Vincent: welcome to Paris, fools.>:)

Entity303: we've been expecting you.>:)

My Holden Coupe 60: oh, puh-lease!>:P

My Mitsubishi Eclipse: we're no longer the weaklings you knew!>:(

Mike458: we knew you'd say that.:P

Vincent: which is why the Bailey is going to be your doom. you'll get slowed down so much you won't even be able to get her.>:)

Pagani Huayra BC: don't be so sure.>:)

all the villains in the VVS: HUH?!O_O

McLaren 675LT: we've done a lot of farming after the One-77. and this time, there's NO WAY you can slow us down, old man.>:)

Alice: *upgrades the Bailey to 5555 3333*

Anais: SON OF A BITCH!>:(

My Mazzanti Evantra: never underestimate the Huayra BC and the 675LT.>:)

Me: but we'll also give her some extra tuning until we MAX PRO her.>:)

Vincent: we'll see about that!>:(

Me: well, your plan fails. what are you gonna do about that?>:)

Vincent: whatever i want! you can't stop me! i have an army!>:)

Me: we have a Huayra BC and a 675LT.>:)

Pagani Huayra BC and McLaren 675LT: *rev up their engines*

Vincent: whatever. the Elite tuning will slow you down just enough.>:)

BXR Bailey Blade GT1: AREA RESTRICTED. ALL NOOB INTRUDERS 2 B HAXORED BY ME L33T 3NDUR0 BAILEY! I AM TEH VIVENDI ALLY. I ROXOR U AND THEN ROFL! THEN U AM CRY! I RECEIVE ORDERS THRU ANTENNA ON THIS L33T HELMET! IT IS HOTNESS. I MUST OBEY ALL ORDERS! I LIKE 2 PWN NOOBZ 4 TEH MASTER VIVENDSORZ. U=NOOBZ. BAILEY=L33T. PREPARE 4 TOTAL PWNAGE. WOOT WOOT WOOT WOOT!

suddenly, a bunch of Mishima Zaibatsu members

Kazuya Mishima: *beats the crap out of the Mishima Zaibatsu members with his Mishima Style karate*

Heihachi Mishima: NANI?!O_O (translation: WHAT?!)

BXR Bailey Blade GT1: NOOBZ STILL R NOT PWNED! CONTINUE PWNERSHIP UNTIL ALL NOOBZ R PWNED! TEH ESCAPE IS IMPOSSIBLE! I AM 2 L33T! I OWNZ JOO! U WILL GET FLATZORED BY MY L33T TIR3Z!

Hanna: we're in for one hell of a fight. get ready.>:I

Luigi: i dunno about this.':I

Alfa Romeo Mito GTA: okay, time's up. LET'S DO THIS!! *charges towards challenge 1* LEEROOOOOOOOOOOOYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY JEEEEEEEENKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINSSSSSS!!!>:D

My Ford Focus RS: oh my god, she just ran in. ._.

and that ends episode 11 of season 8 of "Asphalt stories". hopefully i can handle the RX-8 SE R&D  and the Bailey EDD at the same time.

until next time.

-Azelfland.