User blog:Azelfland/Car dialogues: New Year's special

i know that it's going to be a late one, but here it is. the first blog of 2018.

finally got that Huayra BC R&D out of the way. and three days ago, i got a PlayStation 4 with Gran Turismo Sport and Uncharted: The Lost Legacy with it. and now i play Gran Turismo Sport, alongside Asphalt 8, which is really fun, but also hard at the same time. anyway, i think you get where i'm going with this.

this is episode 5 of season 5 of "Car dialogues". once again, first one of 2018. so, here goes:

Shadow Azelfland: huh? what happened to the scientists? and why are they tied up?:I

My Pagani Huayra BC: i don't know, man. but we have to keep going. test 52 is waiting.>:I

at test 52

Natalia Nova: my crew is starting to annoy me. can't even take care of a nobody from nowhere. they lose this round it's you and me.>:(

after tests 52 to 54

Shelby: um, why is the entire staff tied up? that's, like, totally scary.O_O

The boss of Vivendi: that's because WE took over lab 4.>:)

Shadow Azelfland: YOU AGAIN?!>:(

Shelby: are you trying to ruin our new year?!>:(

the boss of Vivendi: wait. what?:I

Shadow Azelfland: DON'T PLAY DUMB WITH US! WE KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TRYING TO DO!>:(

the boss of Vivendi: i'm not dumb. and yes, i'm gonna ruin your New Year.:P

Pagani Huayra BC: i say we make a truce for New Year's eve.:I

the boss of Vivendi: *sighs* fine. we'll make a truce for New Year's eve. but know this. after New Year's eve, we're sworn enemies again.>:I

Shadow Azelfland: hmph. say that once i kick that R&D to the next dimension.>:I

January 1st, 2018. it's test 60 time on the San Diego Harbor. Natalia Nova lines up next to Shadow Azelfland.

Shadow Azelfland: you're about to race the winner of this R&D.>:)

Natalia Nova: i love when you trash talk. it's just talk and the trash comes with you. *starts livestreaming, while the race begins* helloooooooooooooo Nova Babies. this is SuperNova LIVE from the race track.:D

My Pagani Huayra BC: WHAT THE HELL?! ARE YOU LIVESTREAMING THIS?!O_O

Natalia Nova: grab some snacks and grab some friends for tonight's main event: Natalia versus the nobody.:D

both land on the first airship

Natalia Nova: an expectedly slow start from nobody. let's see if he can move his feet fast enough to get that Flintstone-Mobile moving.>:)

Shadow Azelfland: *overtakes her* bye, Natalia.>:D

Natalia Nova: you might remember Shadow Azelfland from his horrible takedown a few months ago. well, let me reassure you: he's the same ol' Shadow Azelf now that he was then. say something for the crowd, nobody.:)

Shadow Azelfland: keep watching. i'm gonna crush your superstar.>:)

on the straight

Natalia Nova: oooooh! thanks for the donation, WolfTFK! Five more dollars and i'll sing any song the chat wants. who's gonna get me there?:3

My Pagani Huayra BC: how can you concentrate on racing and livestreaming at the same time?:I

as they are headed to the storage

Natalia Nova: Nova Babies, are you ready? the second half is where SuperNova REALLY shines.:D

Shadow Azelfland (being sarcastic): i'm sure it is.>:I

on the final straight

Natalia Nova: NO WAY! this is ridiculous!>:(

Shadow Azelfland and the Huayra BC finish first

Shadow Azelfland: SHOW'S OVER, NATALIA NOVA!>:D

Shelby: that was awesome! you crushed her!:D *they both make out*

the boss of Vivendi: SON OF A BITCH! I THOUGHT I HAD YOU THIS TIME! no matter. you'll never get the Bone Shaker. just so you know, we rigged one of the qualifiers of the championship. try to guess which one it is. oh, wait. you can't.>:)

MICROAGRESSION! HIT HIM!>:D

Shadow Azelfland: *uses the Electric Fly on the boss of Vivendi* JOHNYSTARTTHECAAAAAAAAAR!!D:< *throws the boss of Vivendi to the wall*

the boss of Vivendi: what the heck was that for?O_O

Shadow Azelfland: this was for using a microagression on us. oh, and Shelby?>:)

Shelby: hm?:I

Shadow Azelfland: what do you say you go for the nut shot?>:)

Shelby: *giggles* sure.:3

the boss of Vivendi: no. not the nut shot. anything but the nut shot.O_O

Shelby: *grabs the boss of Vivendi from the coat* don't even think about making fun of my fashion ever again. because you know what happens to people who think i'm a damsel in distress AND who dare to make fun of my fashion?>:(

the boss of Vivendi: i didn't mean it. i swear.O_O

Shelby: WE KICK THEM IN THE BALLS!>:( *kicks the boss of Vivendi right in the nuts*

the boss of Vivendi: *screams in pain*

Shelby: serves you right, jerk!>:(

Shadow Azelfland: okay. i got the 3 remaining blueprints for the Huayra BC, 130 tokens and 50.000 credits.>:I

Shelby: okay. let's bring the blueprints to Alice. she knows what to do.>:I

Shadow Azelfland: right. okay, Hayabusa. get us out of here, before you-know-who recovers from the nut shot.>:I

My Suzuki Hayabusa: you got it.>:I

meanwhile, in Tenerife

TheHawtDawg1: i wonder how Shadow Azelfland is holding up.:I

Hanna: i don't know. what if he didn't make it?:I

Larry Wood: wait, who's Shadow Azelfland?:I

Me: he's myself, but edgy.:I

Shadow Azelfland: did you miss me?:)

Me: DUDE, YOU'RE BACK!:D

Alice: you got the blueprints?:)

Shadow Azelfland: yep.:)

Alice: i'll get straight to it.:)

Shadow Azelfland: and who's with you? and no, Jun Imai is with us since the Rip Rod championship. i meant the other guy.:I

Larry Wood: oh, where are my manners? i'm Larry Wood, AKA "Mr. Hot Wheels".:)

Shadow Azelfland: i'm Shadow Azelfland. nice to meet you, mister Wood.:)

Larry Wood: you see, your friends are the real deals. they're forces to be reckoned with.:)

Me: well, let's just say we're too good at this.:)

TheHawtDawg1: and now, Azelfland made a deal with Polyphony and we have another garage for Gran Turismo cars only. the boss of Vivendi doesn't know about it.:)

Hanna: i'd say things are going well for all of us.:)

meanwhile, back at the Grand Canyon base

the boss of Vivendi: ow. okay, i'm starting to feel a bit bet-

Demonic voice: YOU IDIOT! YOU LET THEM GET AWAY AGAIN!

the boss of Vivendi: huh? who's there?!O_O

a demonic version of Azelfland comes before the boss of Vivendi

???: so, you were beaten with a kick to the crotch? pathetic.>:(

the boss of Vivendi: AZELFLAND?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY BASE?! and.............. why do you have black eyes with red pupils on them? and why are you crying blood?:I

???: i am his demonic alter ego. you can call me Azelfland.exe.>:I

the boss of Vivendi: what?:I

Azelfland.exe: 2 years ago, the exploration team of the same name - team Azelfland - had come after me. they traversed hell and with that, George the Raichu and Devin the Sceptile killed Satan.>:(

the boss of Vivendi: wait a minute. i thought he was immortal.:I

Me: *pauses the action and breaks the fourth wall* of course, this is a reference to me playing Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Darkness back then. and i made up the whole "team Azelfland killed Satan" thing, just to give my demonic alter ego a backstory. and if you don't know, the Raichu is named George, which is my real name and the Sceptile is named Devin, which is Marriland's real name, just to give them character. also, you might want to check out Marriland. he's a very awesome YouTuber, who has some awesome pokemon videos.:) *unpauses the action*

Azelfland.exe: he was, until they came and burned him to crisps with a Thunderbolt. i am what's left of his ashes.>:(

the boss of Vivendi: what do you want from me?O_O

Azelfland.exe: your failures cost me too much. no matter. there are other worlds to take down, like the pokemon world. there are many places Azelfland and his friends can hide. but i won't tell you ANYTHING.>:I

the boss of Vivendi: why's that?:I

Azelfland.exe: BECAUSE THEY KEEP WINNING! they always get away from me, no matter what. even when i struck his own city in Minecraft, he still beat me!>:(

the boss of Vivendi: really obnoxious, i tell you.-_-

Azelfland.exe: BUT i was hoping that his Nintendo DSi XL would zap him and kill him. and i was the one who did this. but it turns out he survived, turned into an Azelf and got super powers beyond my imagination. he's stronger than ever.>:I

Me:* pauses the action and breaks the fourth wall again* and basically, this is my character backstory right there. i was an ordinary human being, until i got zapped by my Nintendo DSi XL. i fell unconscious and turned into an Azelf, giving me super powers. in real life, however, i'm still a normal human being, like everyone. so, yeah.:) *unpauses the action*

the boss of Vivendi: how do we destroy him?:I

Azelfland.exe: someday, we will destroy him. just make sure you do it right.>:(

the boss of Vivendi: okay. okay, i will.O_O

Azelfland.exe: good.>:)

and that's the end of episode 5 of season 5 of "car dialogues". now, having a demonic alter ego can be hard, but i'll only use him for the failures of Vivendi in the future.

Happy new year!

-Azelfland.