User blog:Azelfland/Asphalt stories: Azelfland's Q&A

yep. i thought of making a Q&A like R8 tyke did.

this is episode 9 of season 10 of "Asphalt stories" WARNING! lots of fourth wall breaking. now, let's get ROOOIIIIIIIGHT to the questions!

a question for Azelfland: what was your best moment in 2018?
Me: i'm glad you asked! it has to be me winning the final AI of the Apollo IE in a tie. it was awesome!^_^

My Apollo IE: and ever since, i became Azelfland's best car.................. that is until the X2 came and became the best, which now makes me the second best.:P

a question for Hanna: why does Azelfland hate the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, or PETA for short?
Hanna: he has five reasons he hates them. one, their flash games ruin people's childhoods. two, their ads make no sense. three, they abused my friends. four, they claim they save animals, but in reality, they kill them. and five, they only do this for money.>:(

a question for Nick: if zombies came in, what would you do?
Nick: i would call........................ squash.:D

the zombies from Plants VS Zombies: huh?!

Squash: *squashes the zombie horde* EWWW! GROSS! zombie guts!D:

another question for Azelfland: what is your real name?
Me: whoa. i............. think you're asking me a personal question. but my real name is George. but you can still call me Azelfland. just saying.:P

another question for Hanna: how do you and Azelfland spend time together?
Hanna: well, we go to the gym we have in our garage together. yes, i know that we fight in the ring, but we only do it for fun. we also spend our time going out together. and he's so kind.:3

a question for the Centenario: what do you think of the token-only upgrades on you?
My Lamborghini Centenario: i have to agree with Azelfland. whoever thought of this godawful idea in the first place must really have a death wish!>:(

two questions for the Ferrari FXX-K: one, why are you blue? and two, why does Azelfand hate the CX-75?
My Ferrari FXX-K: to answer your first question, he didn't like the shades of blue i had. so, Alice went for some standard blue on me. as for the second one, Azelfland hates the CX-75 because, back when he was the king of CSR Racing, he struggled with him and couldn't do well with the shifting in The Hunt. but with me and my big brother, that's a different story. also, The Hunt? more like THE C**T!:P

a question for Danny: how can you punch so fast?
Danny: well, i'm just pretty good at it. and with the oras i yell, it's basically a reference to JoJo's Bizzare Adventure. if you don't get the reference, i feel sorry for you.:P

a question for Cynthia: how come you're always a jolly girl, but you get serious when someone tries to hurt your friends?
Cynthia: it's because anyone who dares o harm my friends will not get away so easily. that's whta happened with Adrian AND the Conglomerate head. and it will happen with the next new villain.>:I

a question for ThunderWolf: why does every single bad guy doubt about the Hokuto Shinken?
ThunderWolf: it's to catch them off guard. once i tell them that they're already dead, BOOM! they die. and it's because i press their hidden pressure points without them noticing.:P

a question for TF2014: what's with the GTA references?
TF2014: it's because i'm a big fan of the GTA series and i can see Azelfland is also a big fan of the series as well........... and the meme of Big Smoke's order.:P

a question for Shadow Azelfland: how is your rivalry with Shadow?
Shadow Azelfland: well, it now became a friendly rivalry to say the least.:P

a question for Alice: did Azelfalnd get the Bugatti Chiron?
Alice: he did. and if you want to know how he got it, ya'll need to ask the Chiron himself.:P

a question for the Bugatti Chiron: how did Azelfland and his friends get you?
My Bugatti Chiron: well, i was gonna get contained to a ship on Osaka, until Azelfland and his girl came in to save me. and his friends were also great. here's what happened.:)

three hours ago, after getting all 60 blueprints for the Chiron

Me: they're transporting the Chiron across Tokyo in two hours. we intercept, then grab the cargo.>:I

Hanna: it'll be part of a convoy.>:I

Me: what are you thinking?>:I

Hanna: quick hit and run.get me close to the truck and i'll take care of the rest. Alice, have you finished turning the GT350R into a runner?>:I

Alice: yep. followed your specs and the plating's all in. she'll take a punch and dish it right back.:)

Me: great. P1 boy, did you and Alice get that drone ready to fly?>:I

McLaren P1 boy: i'll be your eyes in the sky.>:)

Me: okay. time to show Vivendi we're back.>:)

in the streets of Tokyo

My Ford Shelby GT350R: let's grab ourselves a hypercar.>:)

McLaren P1 boy: the drone is online and i'm looking for the convoy. you guys better hurry to the rendezvous point.:P

Me: not sure what Alice did to the GT350R, but it feels tight and heavy. like it's tensed up for a punch.:)

Hanna: okay, Azelf. remeber. Vivendi will have enforcers to protect the convoy. so, we'll have to take them down first. get me on the truck before the tunnel for Osaka and we're in business.>:I

McLaren P1 boy: the air surveliance will be blind inside the tunnel. the perfect time for a hit and run.>:)

Ford Shelby GT350R: bulletproof plan.:)

McLaren P1 boy: worst-case scenario, we improvisse, right?:I

Hanna: *giggles* that won't be nescesary.^_^

on the rendezvous point

McLaren P1 boy: i see it. the truck is almost there. and they brought their muscle.>:I

the truck passes by Azelfland and Hanna

Me: here we go.>:I *gets in the GT350R*

Hanna: get me close to that truck before it hits the tunnel.>:I

Ford Shelby GT350R: *gets close*

Hanna: Vivendi won't let us near the truck. we need to take them out first.>:I

Me: with pleasure.>:) *knocks down the first of two Challengers*

McLaren P1 boy: hahaha! nice hit, Azelf.^_^

Me: one down, one to go.>:) *knocks down the other Challenger*

Hanna: get me in posistion.>:I

Ford Shelby GT350R: *gets behind the truck, but the truck brakes abruptly*

Hanna: LOOK OUT!O_O

Me: OH S**T!O_O *crashes to the truck and spins out, leaving the door of the convoy open*

the truck goes on a rampage

McLaren P1 boy: what's going on?!O_O

Me: got brake-checked hard. we'll get him! *sees the rampage the truck caused* what the hell?!O_O

McLaren P1 boy: this guy is out of his mind!O_O

Hanna: there's something much bigger going on here. Vivendi wouldn't go this far just for a car.>:I

Me: what's the play?>:I

Hanna: new plan. forget the tunnel. we get him before he reaches Osaka.>:I

McLaren P1 boy: are you guys SEEING this?!O_O

Hanna: seeing AND feeling!O_O

McLare P1 boy: backup! they got backup!>:I

Me: i see them.>:I

Hanna: take 'em out, Azelf!>:I

Me: *knocks down the Range Rovers*

Hanna: these guys are tougher.>:I

McLaren P1 boy: fricking tanks is what they are.O_O

Me: they're going down either way.>:I *knocks down more of the Range Rovers*

McLaren P1 boy: guys, more Vivendi enforcers coming your way.>:I

Me: we'll handle it.>:) *knocks down two more of the Range Rovers*

McLaren P1 boy: guys? i hear an awful lot of cop chatter. we got someone's attention.O_O

Me: then let's get this done fast.>:I

McLaren P1 boy: that last car is not gonna let you near the truck. you need to get rid of it.>:I

Me: *knocks down the last Range Rover* i think we lost the muscle. P1 boy?>:I

McLare P1 boy: yep. that truck is all yours. you know Vincent is gonna get steaming mad when he finds out we took his new toy.>:)

Me: payback, baby!>:D

near the right side truck

Hanna: keep it steady.....!>:I *gets to the hood of the GT350R*

Me: jump!O_O *near-misses a traffic car*

Hanna: *gets to the top of the convoy, then get in the convoy and in the Chiron*

McLaren P1 boy: Hanna? Hanna, you got this?O_O

Me: HANNA?!O_O

Hanna: *get out of the convoy with the Chiron* i got this.>:)

McLaren P1 boy: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! that's what i'm talking about!:D

Me: good job, team. let's take this bad boy back home.:)

Hanna: i'll see you there.:)

Ford Shelby GT350R: i'm getting too hot. we'll get straight to the garage.>:I *teleports with Azelfland*

McLaren P1 boy: Hanna, that's a HELL of a lot of cops on your tail. you sure you can handle them?:I

Hanna: in THIS car? they'll never keep up.>:)

halfway to the garage

McLaren P1 boy: you're kidding me. you're halfway to Azelfland's second garage already?!:O

Hanna: i like this car.^_^

McLaren P1 boy: so, Hanna. how's he handling?:)

Hanna: you know when you step on the gas and the engine growls to life for a second?:)

McLaren P1 boy: oooooooh yeah.:D

Hanna: like that. except it never stops.:P

McLaren  P1 boy: man, i can't WAIT to drive it!^_^

Me: sorry, P1 boy. the Chiron goes straight to me as soon as Alice has a peek under the hood.:P

McLaren P1 boy: DAMN IT! why don't I get to drive the cool cars?:(

Hanna: this thing is on fire!^_^ *gets to the garage*

meanwhile, outside of Tokyo

Vincent: so, you lost the car. this kind of failure will not become a pattern.>:(

Mike458: i'll find whoever did this. you can be sure of that.>:I

Vincent: you know my investors are becoming anxious. i pulled you out of the Barrio because i thought you could handle this.>:(

Mike458: i can!>:(

Vincent: i hope so. what's under the hood was more worth than your life.>:I *hangs up*

Mike458: *slams his fist angrily to the steering wheel of his ME418*  this better not be you, Azelfland.>:( *drives away*

back to the present

Bugatti Chiron: and that's how i joined team Azelfland.^_^

a question for R8 tyke: what's your team's name in Real Racing 3 going to be?
Audi R8 tyke: i call it Asphalteers. cool, right?:)

a question for the Sesto Elemento: is 2019 going to be awesome?
My Lamborghini Sestio Elemento: i dunno.:I

another question: nice chinese new year's decal.
Lamborghini Sesto Elemento: not a question, but thanks.^_^

a question for Wendy: how did Azelfland learn seven different martial arts?
Wend: we taught him everything we know. he even learned the Mishima style Karate.:P

a question for P1 boy: how did you join Azelfland?
McLaren P1 boy: well, i basically went insane, but when i regained my sanity, i stopped working for Vincent and joined Azelfland. that's all i have to say.:P

another question for TF2014: why doesn't ANYONE respect Azelfland's opinions.
TF2014: probably because they're being a bunch of idiots. especially that TweakRacer.-_-

TweakRacer: WHAT DID YOU SAY?!>:(

TF2014: look what this whole "hating-on-Gameloft" thing has made you. you can't even accept other people's unpopular opinions without insulting Gameloft.>:( *points the power-of-rejection exterminator at TweakRacer*

TweakRacer: NO! PLEASE! I'LL DO ANYTHING! JUST DON'T HURT ME!O_O

TF2014: *shoots TweakRacer with the power-of-rejection exterminator and gets rid of TweakRacer's power of rejection* now you can no longer use your rejection to harm us OR anyone else. now get out of here! and don't come back until you've learned to accept other people's unpopular opinions.>:(

TweakRcaer: .........................................>:( *walks away*

TF2014: sorry about that. last question.:P

last question: is there anything else we want to know?
Me: nope, but there IS one thing we need to say.:)

Everyone: happy new year, everyone!^_^

End of the Q&A.
and that's for the Q&A and this episode. it was a really fun thing to do.

happy new year!

-Azelfland.